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Submission to another person is a very challenging Christian teaching. Christians are called to submit to Jesus and be obedient to Him for “He is the Head of the body, the Church” (Col. 1:18a). The Apostle Paul tells the Colossians: “Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.” (Col. 3:18). This submission is not by force but voluntary since the God-appointed leadership for the Christian family is the husband (1 Cor. 11:3). The wife might be willing to submit to a husband whose views and values she believes in, since upon that foundation he makes decisions for the family. But what if there are differences of views and values? Wives – do you lovingly submit to your husband’s leadership?
Christian husbands are told: “Love your wives and do not be harsh with them” (Col. 3:19). This may seem the “expected norm” nowadays with the jingle “Love and marriage goes together like a horse and carriage”. However, it was quite a bold thing to tell the mainly Greek Colossians who consider women as property. This love is unconditional and sacrificial as Jesus gave himself for the Church (Eph. 5:25). The husband is to treat his wife with patience, joy and forgiveness. The Christian wife will then submit to him lovingly, maintaining marital love and harmony in the family. Husbands – do you use your authority as head of the family to lord over your wives?
Christian children are to “obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord” (Col. 3:20). This is called out in the 5thCommandment (Exo. 20:12). Honouring parents is in fact a very practical and visible way for us to display Christ-likeness. Children are to be good testimonies in their living for Jesus through their filial piety to parents. At the same time fathers are told: “do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged” (Col. 3:21). Parents are given authority over their children but are to use it out of love and interest for them. Fathers – do you use your words/actions to your children to build them up or put them down?
For Christians, the measure of our Christ-likeness is how we exhibit compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience and live these out. Jesus is to be the centre of every relationship we have, especially in our marriages and families! We make Jesus our source of love, joy, strength, forgiveness and wisdom to deal with all our family relationships.
